Why Belly Fat Is Killing Your Sex Life

Couple eating a appleSex is the single most avoided subject between male and female. If you have experienced a decrease in your sexual appetite, you already know why you do not want to talk about it. When you are overweight, the subject is even usually a bit more dicey…….because you are not the only one involved.

She “may also” not be very happy about the weight you need to lose.When she has stopped being “grabby” in the bedroom, you know that you need to get “saddled up” and do something about this problem.  But first, here are the straight facts as to why your belly fat is costing you good lovin’.

The good news is, that is not your fault. There is some medical science behind why you just do not have it in you. The culprit is the belly fat. Not you. Have you ever  noticed that Viagra is one of the top rated drugs on the market?  Well, while Viagra is topping the charts, it is no coincidence that obesity, as a disease, has never been so prevalent in all of human history.  From an article by Truestar Health there are  a number of factors working against your mojo:

  1. Higher estrogen level – belly fat actually increases the conversion of testosterone into estrogen.  That means that you are actually getting more of the female hormone estrogen than the testosterone that you need to drive your prowess in the bedroom. And the more estrogen, the more abdominal fat will accumulate…the snow ball effect ensues.
  2. Lower testosterone level – leads to increases of the pot belly and other body fat, such as love handles. Of course, the lower the testosterone, the lower the love drive.
  3. Stress - causes high cortisol levels which in turn causes loss of muscle mass, decreases bone density and drives libido way down.

What To Do About Your Sex

OK, so at least now you know now, why Mr. D has not been showing up lately. Like I said, it isn’t your fault. But now, though, it’s simply a matter of caring better for yourself. Let me tell you what to do about this.

Start a strength training program. Pec’s, triceps, biceps, shoulders, abdomen, and back. The beauty of strength training is that it is the engine that drives weight loss. Why? When you work major muscle groups in weight training, your body is burning calories for you while you sleep.

Remember that when you lift, you are tearing down muscles. The calories in your body are in turn used to repair these muscles. Thus more calories are being burned continuously on your behalf. This repair work goes on around the clock.  The immediate benefit though is that strength training reduces stress and thus cortisol. This helps build libido straight away.

Once the cortisol level is managed you are on the path to reducing belly fat and correcting your hormones. The whole process starts immediately when you start your strength training. If you do not have the cash or time to go to a gymn, start doing push-ups, sit-ups leg lifts right now. If you want your sex back enough, you will get very creative. So start today.

The Valentine’s Dog – Don’t Be One!

Disgruntled Fat Valentine CupidYeah…annual ritual, it’s Valentine’s Day. You know what I’m talking about.  It’s show time! Time to get gussied up and look as good as possible. That means pants with a zipper and a jacket with no zipper. For others guys, it means wishing you had a reason to get dressed up.

But for you, it’s freakin’ judgment day, dude! Either your gut and butt fit in your clothes or they don’t. She is expecting your best today. You coming up short of her expectations, may mean bedroom exile, later on. At the worst, you slide into home. It is what I call being a Valentine’s Dog. I have come up short on expectations on Valentine’s Day and ended up a Valentine’s Pooch. Ouch!

If  you bought new clothes for the occasion this year, you’re probably covered. But for the rest of us, fitting into last year’s clothes is, well…..”a stretch.”  This year, I’ve got most of the situation under control.  I’ve got dinner reservations for 7:00 pm at Baker Hotel in Saint Charles, I’ve got the flowers, and the candy. Oh yes, and THE CARD. (PLEASE, don’t forget the card).

So at the moment, I’m stuffed like a sausage into a large sized black sweater, but feel confident enough to be able to suck in my gut for the entire evening. I am wearing some black pants that are more than snug around the waist. But the overall package looks pretty good. So, I’ve got it covered as much as I can. I’ve been working out and eating the right stuff. But tonight, that really doesn’t matter, does it?  The question is, of course, how do I make sure she is happy tonight?

Well, here is how this is gonna happen tonight.

Listen carefully. It’s going to be, “you look as beautiful as the day I met you,” “these dozen roses are for the love of my life” and “I know you love chocolate, so I bought the ones you like.”  Then I tell her again, how beautiful she looks, tonight. Then guerrilla-like, I borrow a female tactic, and I ask, “do you like how I look tonight?”

This does two things:

1. It is very disarming - let’s be real here, she’s as willing as I am to run across home plate tonight. Right?  So if she really wants to cut me down at the knees, it may be to her disadvantage. Most likely, she’s going to say something nearly complimentary. It’s in her favor. A quote from “The Godfather” comes to mind – “It’s business Sonny, it’s not personal.”

2. It immediately clears the air – if she really has a problem with how I look, here’s her opportunity to say what she has to say. But even if she does say something negative, I can take it…because I asked her opinion. Even so,  she’ll feel better, because I asked her opinion and now she told me. It is out in the open. It’s OK. I’m a diplomat tonight.

This is brilliance. In practice, on “off days” (meaning not a big game night like Valentine’s Day), I have tested this method with great success. I am expecting great things tonight. I hope you get this in time. If not, I would like to hear your Valentine’s Day stories.

Good luck, and don’t get hurt out there.

Belly Fat Male Weight Loss

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Is Male Fitness Effective?

Female Weight Loss

Weight Loss Easily

As time goes by, I am becoming increasingly skeptical of PURE physical fitness programs for male weight loss. You may think that this is pure lunacity. Maybe it  is equally valid for both the male and female, but most easily overlooked for us guys. Honestly, beating yourself to death at the gymn needs to be balanced by your powerful inner conditions.  I recently saw a useful article by Jody Page of  Pacific Weight Loss “Male Fitness – Effective or Not.”

In this piece, Jody mentions the need for fitness, and being fit, is naturally an important part of living a longer life. But you already knew that. But perhaps what you do not know, is that your health, in general, is determined heavily by your inner strength.  By inner strength, I refer to the quality of your emotional state. In other words, are you emotionally feeling good? Can you easily correct bad moods? Are you more likely to be optimistic than pessimistic? Can you keep you mind from wondering into worry, anger or fear? Over a lifetime, negative feelings will drain you of energy that your body needs to live a longer life.

This same type of thinking can improve your fitness incredibly. When you are doing any type of fitness, clear your mind of any negative feelings. ANY amount of negative emotional energy you carry into your fitness program, the less you can focus on looking and feeling better physically. Believe it. Keep your emotional house clean and your progress will explode.

Jody mentions using yoga or meditation to manage your personal state. My experience says that one of the side benefits of exercising is better emotion control. Many years ago, I used to work as a field engineer at a construction site for a nuclear power plant in Pennsylvania. This was in the post-Three Mile Island-era when the nuclear industry was in a “melt-down.” There was always a lot of pressure in maintaining the construction schedule and maintaining quality. To manage my attitude, I used to exercise before I got to the job site each morning.  I was smooth all day as a result of my fitness regime. So it works, as long as you do it.

So, long story short,  you can see that it is sort of a “Catch 22″ situation: more exercise lowers stress, but you need to lower your stress to have enough energy to make fitness effective.  But the only thing you need to remember from this, is just do a little bit every day in managing your emotion and fitness. Every little bit not only helps, but works.

Belly Fat Male Weight Loss

Get your free E-Book on how to lose belly fat now – Click the book image to your left – provide your name and e-mail address and you will be reading this book in minutes – FREE.

Female Weight Loss, too

I was at the gymn today and I began speaking with a woman that I had seen there a few times. I did not know her, but it is rather easy for me to start this type of conversation at the gymn, since I am a regular. So, I just said “hello.” It is amazing what new things you can learn just  by reaching out to others.  Anyhow,  I will use the name Rosa in referring to her, to conceal her identity. As I mentioned earlier, I had seen Rosa on several occasions at the gymn and there is no question in my mind that she works hard at staying in shape. In short, she is a striking woman, that carries a little more than her share.  But I was intrigued why she was there.

Female and Male Weight Loss

Hamster Wheel for People

At this point, you might be wondering why I am telling you about Rosa? This is a blog for men, after all, right? Well, as it appears in my conversation with Rosa, that working hard to lose weight is not just a problem for men. Intelligent weight loss is not only a challenge for the male in gender. We think we are lazy. Well, we are not. Human beings are working much harder than any other species on the planet. Working hard is not the answer.

After asking Rosa how many times she comes to the gymn, she says four times per week,  for 2-1/2 hours each time!  She told me that she is also participating in kick boxing classes two evenings per week and weight training classes two other times per week. Wow! She then sheepishly told me that “she needs to lose some weight.” Additionally, without having yet reached her goal of losing weight, she was now concerned about getting too muscular. I can’t tell you how much compassion I felt for her at that moment. While talking with her, I noticed that she was feeling a little relieved to be able to tell someone her frustration in meeting her goal. I think she also felt complimented that she was noticed by a guy at the gymn.

Here is the point. We choose to put ourselves on a hamster wheel to lose weight. It does not need to be this way. Both women and men are doing this because they know of no other option except work, pills, unreasonable diets and expensive drinks and supplements. Although you may be embarassed to show your gut at the gymn, you can be quite sure that the women there know exactly how you feel. It’s OK.  At this very moment, be confident that punishing yourself to lose weight is doomed to fail. I will show you a better way. Stay tuned.

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